Big Ideas (BI) x 0 = 0

Posted on April 6th, 2008 | by A Worker |

Do you ever scratch your head and wonder what the hell these Masters of the Universe types(MOTUTs) are thinking, and how the frak they come up with some of the moron infused ideas that dribble from their over endowed cranial areas? Peon that I am, I guess I just don’t have the higher order thinking skills of a MOTUT. Hey that’s why they make the big bucks. They’ve got the BIG IDEAS! Here’s a big idea from one of the MOTUTs at Verizon.

Very cagey this character, very cagey indeed, “Let’s take the ticker symbol for Verizon (VZ) and add in some slogans to make a catchy little equation that defines the direction we want the company to go in,” says he. At first glance one might say, “Oh my, that’s cute.” But what happens when we examine the content of the equation.

VZ, well that’s ok. R = revenue alright, I buy that one. C3 , now wait a minute, C = competition, customer and culture. Uhohh, can C in C3 equal three different values: competition, customer and culture? It can if we take the letter out of the word that it represents in the equation, but C by itself has no meaning other than it’s the third letter in the alphabet. So then C x C x C = 0. It’s meaningless. P2 is the same, P x P = 0. So VZ = R + 0 + 0 or Verizon equals Revenue. For MOTUTs that’s what it’s all about. The only logic they understand is the logic of how much they get paid, and that’s probably why no one caught the stupidity of this equation. My friends the worst thing is the guy who came up with this brainstorm makes millions of dollars a year.

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